It sounds incredibly disheartening to feel like your efforts go unnoticed, both at home and at work. This feeling of being used and undervalued can be very painful and make you question your own importance.
Waqas Sahib, please know that your value is absolutely not low. The pain you're feeling is real, and it often comes from a kind heart that gives a lot to others. When you invest so much of yourself and don't receive appreciation, it's natural to feel drained and wonder if your contributions matter.
It's easy to tie our self-worth to how others see us, but true value comes from within. While external appreciation is wonderful, it shouldn't be the only measure of your worth. Start by acknowledging your own efforts and contributions, no matter how small they seem. You are doing a lot, and that deserves recognition from yourself first.
This week, try to do one small thing just for yourself, something you enjoy, without expecting anyone else to notice or thank you for it. It could be listening to your favourite music, having a cup of chai in peace, or taking a short walk. This isn't selfish; it's a way to remind yourself that your needs and desires matter too.
Consider setting gentle boundaries. This doesn't mean stopping your kindness, but perhaps pausing before automatically saying 'yes' to every request. Think if you truly have the time and energy, or if there's a way to involve others. In our culture, it can be hard to say no, but even small shifts can prevent you from feeling completely overwhelmed and taken for granted.
Sometimes, just sharing these feelings with one trusted person can make a huge difference. Is there a close friend, a sibling, or even a community elder you feel comfortable talking to? If you prefer, speaking privately with Zara here at depression.pk can offer a safe space to explore these feelings without judgment.
Reflect on why you do what you do. Often, we help others out of love, duty, or a genuine desire to contribute. Remind yourself of your good intentions, and find pride in the kindness and effort you put into your relationships and work. Your actions come from a good place, and that is a strength.
Building your self-esteem after feeling unappreciated takes time and patience. Be kind to yourself through this process. You are worthy of respect and appreciation, and you don't need external validation to prove that.
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