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Finding Support When Caring for an Elderly Parent

Answered 24 December 2025 at 10:30 pm PKT

Usman, caring for an elderly, ill parent is a deeply loving act, but it can also be incredibly demanding and draining. It's completely normal to feel exhausted and overwhelmed when you are giving so much of yourself.

My elderly father is very ill and I'm his primary caregiver. I'm exhausted all the time and feel like I'm losing myself. Is there any support for caregivers?

What you’re feeling – exhaustion, a sense of losing yourself – is very common for primary caregivers. It's a sign that you're working incredibly hard and need to find ways to replenish your own energy. It doesn't mean you're not strong enough or that you love your father any less.

Even small breaks can make a big difference. Try to find just 15-30 minutes each day where you can step away, even if it's just to sit quietly, listen to some music, read a few pages of a book, or have a cup of chai in peace. These short moments are not a luxury; they are essential for your well-being.

Consider involving other family members, if possible, even in small ways. Could a sibling take over for an hour or two once a week, or could a younger cousin help with errands like grocery shopping or picking up medicines? Sometimes, people want to help but don't know how; be specific about what you need.

Find one trusted person you can talk to openly about how you're feeling. This could be a friend, another relative, or even a neighbour who understands the challenges. Just sharing your worries and frustrations can be a huge relief, and you might find that they have valuable advice or simply offer a listening ear.

Pay attention to your basic needs. When you're exhausted, it's easy to neglect your own sleep, nutrition, and hydration. Try to maintain a regular sleep schedule as much as possible, eat nourishing meals, and drink enough water. Your physical health directly impacts your ability to care for someone else.

Remember that taking care of yourself is not selfish; it’s necessary for you to continue providing the best care for your father. If you are completely burnt out, you won't be able to help him effectively. Give yourself permission to seek and accept support.

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