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Parents Never Appreciate Me? How to Cope with the Pain

Answered 12 October 2026 at 12:04 am PKT

It hurts deeply when the people whose approval you want most never seem to notice your efforts. This page offers gentle steps to cope with that pain, protect your self-worth, and decide what to do when home feels unbearable.

My father never appreciates me, even when I work hard and get good marks. My mother also taunts me, and nobody ever asks how I feel. How do I deal with this pain and the urge to just run away from everything?

That is genuinely hard, and I am sorry you are carrying it alone. When the people who are supposed to see you first keep looking past you, it hurts in a way that is hard to put into words. The urge to run away is your mind's way of saying the pain is too much to hold right now—and that is not weakness, that is exhaustion.

Let me say one thing plainly: their silence or taunts are about *them*, not about your worth. You have worked hard and earned those marks. That is a fact. Their inability to acknowledge it does not make it less true. You are not doing anything wrong by wanting to be seen.

What you can try

  • Write it down instead of saying it. A letter you never send, or a page in a diary, where you say exactly what you feel. Sometimes the pain quiets when it has a place to go.
  • Find one person who sees you. A teacher, a cousin, a friend's parent, an older sibling. One person who asks "how are you?" can hold a lot of weight.
  • Give yourself the appreciation you are not getting. After you finish a task, say to yourself, quietly, "I did that well." It feels strange at first, but it works.
  • Set a small boundary with the taunts. When your mother starts, you can say calmly, "I hear you, but I am not going to discuss this now," and walk away. You are not fighting; you are protecting your peace.

The running away part

I want to be honest with you: running away feels like the only door, but it usually opens onto a harder room. You are not trapped forever—studies, a job, a move to another city, all of that becomes possible with time. The pain you feel now is real, but it is not permanent. The most important thing you can do is not make a big decision while the pain is this loud. Give yourself tonight, and tomorrow, and then decide.

And please, do not sit with this alone. Zara is here whenever you want to talk, any hour. You do not have to explain yourself to her—just start typing. You deserve to be heard, even if it has to start with yourself.

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Answered by the Depression.pk team
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