Kamran, it sounds like you're under a lot of pressure right now, trying to balance your engineering studies with family expectations about marriage. Many young people in Pakistan face similar challenges, and it's completely understandable to feel overwhelmed when your future plans feel disrupted.
It's normal to feel stressed and unable to focus when your academic goals are clashing with such significant family decisions. First, understand that your feelings are valid; it's a lot to handle at your age, especially when you're trying to build a career foundation.
The most important step is to have an open and respectful conversation with your parents or the family member you feel closest to. Choose a calm moment when everyone can listen without interruption. Clearly explain your passion for engineering and how important it is for you to complete your degree and establish yourself professionally before taking on the responsibilities of marriage.
Help them understand that focusing on your studies now is an investment in your future, which will ultimately benefit everyone. You could suggest a timeline, perhaps asking for their support to let you complete your engineering degree first, or even secure a job, before seriously considering marriage proposals. This shows you're not rejecting the idea entirely, but asking for it to be on your terms.
Regarding the 'rishtay' that are coming, you don't have to engage with every proposal right away. You can ask your parents to politely convey that you are currently focused on your studies and career, and would like to defer such discussions for a few years. It's okay to set this boundary, and your parents can help manage these external pressures on your behalf.
While managing family expectations, also make sure you're taking care of your own well-being. Break down your study tasks into smaller, manageable chunks to reduce feelings of being overwhelmed. Take short, regular breaks, even if it's just to walk around, listen to some music, or talk to a trusted friend about what you're going through.
Remember, your goals for your future are important. Prioritizing your education and career right now is a responsible decision that many successful individuals make. Keep reaffirming your commitment to your studies and gently advocating for your needs within your family. You are working towards a brighter future for yourself, and that is a worthy pursuit.
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