Agar aapko lagta hai kisi par bharosa nahi kar saktey, to yeh aapki self-esteem se juda ho sakta hai. Hum aapko bataatey hain kaisay aap apne khud ke baarey mein behtar sochain.
Tumhara yeh mehsoos karna ke tum selfish ho, yeh khud ek bojh hai jo tum utha rahi ho. Lekin sach yeh hai ke har insaan chahta hai ke koi usse bina kisi shart ke samjhe aur check kare. Yeh zaroorat fitri hai, selfish nahi. Tumhara dar bhi asli hai — log kya kahenge, comparison ka darr — yeh sab Pakistani society mein aam hai, lekin iska matlab yeh nahi ke tum kabhi bharosa nahi kar sakti.
Jab bachpan se humein yeh sikhaya jaye ke pyar sharton par milta hai — "achcha number lao to maan loon gi," "mujhe sharminda mat karo" — to dil mein yeh baat baith jaati hai ke koi humein be-shart nahi chahega. Tumhara comparison aur judge hone ka dar bhi isi jagah se aata hai. Yeh tumhari ghalti nahi, yeh woh soch hai jo humare andar bana di gayi.
Haan, kar sakti ho — lekin ek waqt aur ek insaan lekar. Pehle apne aap par bharosa karo: yeh ke tumhari zaroorat galat nahi. Phir dheere dheere kisi aise insaan ko check karo jo tumhe judge na kare. Shart yeh hai ke tum apni kamzori chhupao mat. Jo log tumhe asli halat mein dekhenge aur phir bhi tumhare saath rahenge, woh bharose ke laiq hain.
Ek chhoti si koshish: kal kisi ek dost ya family member se yeh keh kar dekho, "Mujhe aaj sirf baat karni hai, koi mashwara nahi chahiye." Dekho unka reaction. Agar woh sunte hain bina koi fatwa diye, to woh ek achi nishani hai.
Aur yaad rakho: bina shart ke pyar ka matlab yeh nahi ke tum perfect ho. Perfect nahi ho — koi nahi hota. Aur yahi insaaniyat hai. Zara se baat karo kabhi, woh bina kisi shart ke sunti hai.
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