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When Parents and Your Career Dreams Don't Match

Answered 1 July 2025 at 8:50 am PKT

It's completely normal for parents and children to have different ideas about career paths, especially in Pakistan where certain professions like CSS hold great respect and security. It can feel disheartening when your dreams don't align with what your family envisions for you.

My parents want me to do CSS and become a government officer, but I want to start my own business. They are completely against it. How do I convince them?

Your parents likely want what they believe is best for your future, often prioritizing security, status, and stability. For many Pakistani parents, a government job like CSS offers all of this, along with the respect of 'log kya kahenge' – what people will say. Starting a business, on the other hand, can seem very risky and uncertain to them, and their worry comes from a place of love.

The first step is to genuinely listen to their concerns. Instead of immediately arguing, ask them why they feel so strongly about CSS. What are their biggest fears about you starting a business? Understanding their perspective, their worries about your financial stability, or how society might view your choice will help you address those specific points later.

Once you understand their fears, prepare a solid plan for your business idea. Show them you've done your research: what's your market, how will you get funding, what are your initial steps, and how will you manage the risks? Presenting a well-thought-out plan, rather than just an idea, shows maturity and commitment, which can ease some of their anxieties.

Consider involving a trusted family elder or a respected relative who understands both your ambition and your parents' mindset. This person can act as a mediator, helping to explain your perspective to your parents and vouch for your capabilities. Sometimes, an objective voice from someone they respect can make a big difference in how your parents receive your ideas.

It might also be helpful to discuss a phased approach. Could you perhaps start your business on a smaller scale alongside your studies or another part-time commitment, to prove its viability without immediately abandoning all other options? Or could you set a clear timeline – for example, agreeing to dedicate a certain period to your business, with a backup plan if things don't go as expected?

Remember that changing deeply held beliefs takes time and patience. This isn't about winning an argument, but about finding a respectful path forward that acknowledges everyone's concerns. Keep the conversation open and consistent, showing them through your actions and your preparation that you are serious and capable.

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Answered by the Depression.pk team
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