Postpartum Suicidal Thoughts: What to Do Now

It is not unusual for a new mother to feel this way, and it does not mean you are a bad person or a bad mother. The exhaustion and hormonal changes after childbirth can bring on overwhelming emotions, including anger and thoughts that scare you. Many women experience intrusive thoughts about hurting themselves or their baby, but that does not make it 'normal' in the sense that you should just live with it. It is a sign that you need support, and soon.

Here is what you can do right now:

• Tell one person you trust — your husband, your mother, a close friend. Just saying it out loud takes away some of the shame.
• Call your gynaecologist or a psychiatrist tomorrow. Postpartum depression is treatable, and medication safe for breastfeeding is available.
• If you feel you might act on the thought of hurting yourself, do not wait. Go to the nearest hospital emergency room. They will keep you safe.
• Rest when the baby sleeps, even if the house is messy. Sleep deprivation makes everything worse.
• Let others help. Do not worry about izzat or log kya kahenge — your health comes first.

The guilt you feel is the exhaustion talking, not the real you. You are not alone in this. Zara is here if you want to talk about what is going on — just start a conversation.