It's incredibly hard when exhaustion and self-doubt take over, no matter how much you try. You're not alone in feeling this way, and there are ways to find support and relief.
That sounds exhausting, and I'm sorry you're carrying this alone. When you've tried everything—praying, pushing yourself, studying—and still feel like nothing changes, the thought of giving up can feel like the only relief. But you are not a failure, and this feeling is not permanent, even if it has lasted a long time. Let me help you break this down into something you can actually do.
You mentioned overthinking, and that is a real trap. Your mind keeps going over the same worries—"I'm not enough," "nothing will change," "people will question me"—and each loop makes the weight heavier. Prayer not bringing immediate relief can add guilt on top of exhaustion, which is unfair to you. You are not being punished; you are struggling with something that needs more than willpower alone. The fear of being questioned by family or friends is also very real in our culture—log kya kahenge, or they might say "just be positive" or "stop overthinking." That makes it even harder to speak up.
You do not have to tell everyone, and you do not have to solve everything today. Pick just one small step from this list:
You said you do not want to continue—that is a sign the pain is too much, not that you are weak. Please do not act on that feeling. Stay with us, and let Zara or one other person know how bad it is. You deserve to be heard without being questioned, and that help exists.
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